I often feel embarrassed when I am asked if I have read "The Secret Lives of Baba Segi's Wives". For some reason the opportunity to read this book has somehow eluded me, even after a failed attempt by my mum to get the book across to me, It landed in another person's hands and I never got it. Recently, I was asked again if I have read this book and I just made a mental note in my head to purchase it as soon as possible. I did!!
This novel is a thought provoking, funny yet tragic one. It contains vivid depiction of tragic events surrounding the characters in gory details. It also highlights injustice girls, women and men face in their every day lives in a society like Nigeria. I am glad that I got to read this novel now because I believe I have evolved to a stage where I can understand clearly the subtle message the writer was trying to pass across. The novel is centred on polygamy.
Lola Shoneyin writes this book with confidence which makes it really engaging and hard to put down. She combines beautifully irony, humour, sensitivity, empathy and karma in her description of the circumstances these characters find themselves in.
Narration in this novel moves from a third person's narrative to a first person and sometimes second person. Some of these narration goes back to the character's past and also present. In my opinion, the narration enables readers to have an insight into the characters, the concealed societal issues of gender inequalities and the complicated daily living arrangement in polygamous homes.
The main characters included Baba Segi, Iya Segi, Iya Tope, Iya Femi and Bolanle - the fourth wife.
These wives except Iya Segi and Iya Tope - 1st and 2nd wives got married to Baba Segi as a way out and all of them felt they were not deserving of marrying a rich and largely ignorant man, hence they did all they could to remain married to him which made them all have a common secret, well except Bolanle.
Baba Segi prioritised his children above his wives and his quest for more children after having seven was what unravelled the secrets his wives had.
The first three wives had a common secret that was common knowledge to three of them and not once did they blurt it out to anyone outside the three of them despite few verbal altercations. Their reluctance to be friendly to the fourth wife because of her 'graduate' status and thereby possibly sharing that common secret with her was probably their undoing.
Baba Segi is described as an uneducated hardworking, relatively successful, ignorant, misogynist and polygamous man who vomits and poops in his pants when he gets upsets. His wives except Bolanle are equally uneducated, ignorant and conniving. For the provision of a home and financial support, his wives, pamper cook, clean for him and massage his ego.
Bolanle (A university graduate) the central character of this book gets married to Baba Segi against her mother's wish and beneath her mother's expectations.
When Bolanle was introduced into the household, as predicted she was not welcomed and to worsen the situation, she didn't get pregnant despite all the 'pounding' she received from Baba Segi. It was funny reading the dialogues she was having with herself as regards the plans she had for everyone in the household. Unfortunately that plan fell flat on arrival!!
The wives especially Iya Segi and Iya Femi did all they could to make Bolanle's stay in their home unbearable, from accusing her of Juju, to banning her friends from coming to visit her, to not allowing Baba Segi to get her an arm chair. That was a priviledge reserved for women with children, they told Baba Segi but due to Bolanle's secret and firm resolve, she didn't bulge, she stayed put in the house.
Her inability to get pregnant upsets Baba Segi, what upsets him more is her snobbish attitude towards alternative medicine and prophets. Her presence in his home has already created tension and unease amongst his wives. He could not place his hand on the cause of unease and tension, after all he shared his time with them equally and based on his myopic thoughts, he thinks if she gets pregnant, there will be less tension. He finally takes her to the hospital based on the advise he received from his friend 'Teacher', this visit to the hospital reveals all the layers of secrets in his household.
It was heart warming to read that there was no judgement from the health officials when Bolanle revealed her secret and even though Baba Segi had his normal stomach problem after he heard it, not once during the course of reading this book did he reveal it to anyone.
There were a few questions that comes to mind while reading this novel, foremost of them is why will a beautiful university graduate choose to get married to an uneducated and ignorant man who already has a house full of children and wives and who's sense of hygiene is questionable?
Why did the wives feel intimidated by Bolanle's presence in their home?
What was the secret all the wives had?
All these questions and many more that comes to mind were answered in this novel.
I was pleasantly surprised at the tail end of the novel with Baba Segi's edifying response to Akin - his eldest son's statement to him "My father, I want to be a man about this but I fear I am not"
and his response - "Akin, you are more than a man for it is only a true man who acknowledges weakness. Your sister will watch over you from the next world. Know this and let it strengthen you"
Another pleasantly surprising moment for me was when Bolanle advised Segi when she was out hanging out with her crush and his friends "A real woman must always do the things she wants to do, and in her own time too. You must never allow yourself to be rushed into doing things you're not ready for"
I was slightly disappointed that the wives did not apologise to Bolanle for what they did to her.
It was hard not to feel sorry for Baba Segi as he was also a victim of a patriarchal society alongside his wives and children.
This novel was predictable at the beginning but it took quite a few unexpected twists and turns.
The end was superb and exhilarating. I was superbly pleased for Bolanle , the lessons she learnt and her resolve to be better.
This novel is a feminist delight, a must read for everyone.
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